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The Poetry of Tyrants

Posted by Michelle Porter on

Bad poetry? Probably written by a tyrant or villain, according to Andy Jones, author of Jack and the Green Man, the first chapter book in his Jack tales series.

“The Green Man is that kind of powerful tyrant who has no sense of nobility, no sense of obligation to anyone but himself.

“Even his poetry: he’s a bad poet,” said Andy.

Printed in his own handwriting, the Green Man’s poetry is hilariously awful: self-pitying, vengeful, and funny.

They’re evidence of how awful the villain is. But they’re also fun to read, whether you’re a ten-year-old boy totally unimpressed with the idea of romance, or whether you’re all grown-up with a few bad dates behind you.

There are two poems here to start you off.

KNOWING YOU by Goliath Green

Every word of you passed before my eyes 

But sometimes my mind drifted

SAD LOVE POEM #105 by Goliath Green

Slip away in your canoe 

In the middle of the night 

From the island of my love! 

Drink a stinky witch’s brew 

Just so you can quit my sight 

Do it! All of the above!